Over, Under, and Around Average

I've been feeling pretty crummy lately over life in general...and I've reached a couple of conclusions. I've always been a bit of an over-achiever. Nothing too fantastic, but with rare exceptions (visual arts, math, P.E.) throughout my school years, I have excelled at everything I've tried. I would throw myself into English, geography, history, music, and though I was never the best, I was always good. Maybe I've gotten a little cocky. Yes, I have gotten a little cocky.

Then there were the "average" kids. The ones who just went through the motions without any real visible passion for any of it. They never got awards or recognition, and life seemed to get in the way of their excelling. I felt bad for them, thanked my lucky stars I was blessed with a brain and body that could handle the public education system, and swore that I would never let petty things get in the way of me moving forward.

Oh, that was silly of me.

My aura of "over-achiever" has evaporated, and real life has finally caught up with me. In fact, it hasn't just caught up with me, it has almost overwhelmed me. I'm trapped in some absurdly protracted and elongated joke. The dumb undergraduate degree is going to go on FOREVER. I am NEVER going to be able to afford a car again. I will NEVER move out. There is a list, that goes on and on until it overshadows all the positive things. And normally, I'm a positive person. But this is just too much.

Granted, those FOREVERs and NEVERs aren't real. They will eventually go away. But -oh man- it's sure taking its time.